12-25-2007, 08:30 PM
ten -- nearly eleven
years since they had parted. It was curious how seldom he thought of her.
For days at a time he was capable of forgetting that he had ever been
married. They had only been together for about fifteen months. The Party
did not permit divorce, but it rather encouraged separation in cases where
there were no children.
Katharine was a tall, fair-haired girl, very straight, with splendid
movements. She had a bold, aquiline face, a face that one might have called
noble until one discovered that there was as nearly as possible nothing
behind it. Very early in her married life he had decided -- though perhaps
it was only that he knew her more intimately than he knew most people --
that she had without exception the most stupid, vulgar, empty mind that he
had ever encountered. She had not a thought in her head that was not a
slogan, and there was no imbecility, absolutely none that she was not
capable of swallowing if the Party handed it out to her. 'The human sound-
track' he nicknamed her in his own mind. Yet he could have endured living
with her if it had not been for just one thing -- sex.
As soon as he touched her she seemed to wince and stiffen. To embrace
her was like embracing a jointed wooden image. And what was strange was
that even when she was clasping him against her he had the feeling that she
was simultaneously pushing him away with all her strength. The rigidlty of
her muscles managed to convey that impression. She would lie there with
shut eyes, neither resisting nor co-operating but submitting. It was
extraordinarily embarrassing, and, after a while, horrible. But even then
he could have borne living with her if it had been agreed that they should
remain celibate. But curiously enough it was Katharine who refused this.
They must, she said
years since they had parted. It was curious how seldom he thought of her.
For days at a time he was capable of forgetting that he had ever been
married. They had only been together for about fifteen months. The Party
did not permit divorce, but it rather encouraged separation in cases where
there were no children.
Katharine was a tall, fair-haired girl, very straight, with splendid
movements. She had a bold, aquiline face, a face that one might have called
noble until one discovered that there was as nearly as possible nothing
behind it. Very early in her married life he had decided -- though perhaps
it was only that he knew her more intimately than he knew most people --
that she had without exception the most stupid, vulgar, empty mind that he
had ever encountered. She had not a thought in her head that was not a
slogan, and there was no imbecility, absolutely none that she was not
capable of swallowing if the Party handed it out to her. 'The human sound-
track' he nicknamed her in his own mind. Yet he could have endured living
with her if it had not been for just one thing -- sex.
As soon as he touched her she seemed to wince and stiffen. To embrace
her was like embracing a jointed wooden image. And what was strange was
that even when she was clasping him against her he had the feeling that she
was simultaneously pushing him away with all her strength. The rigidlty of
her muscles managed to convey that impression. She would lie there with
shut eyes, neither resisting nor co-operating but submitting. It was
extraordinarily embarrassing, and, after a while, horrible. But even then
he could have borne living with her if it had been agreed that they should
remain celibate. But curiously enough it was Katharine who refused this.
They must, she said